Married Life

Top Ten Reasons I love my husband:
1. He loves to snuggle, especially when he is tired.
2. His love for me stems directly from his love for Jesus Christ, and while it's not perfect it's beautiful.
3. He takes me as I am, and is patient with me when I do not fit his expectations of how life ought to be.
4. He makes killer popcorn (even if he did leave the pot with the oil still in it on the still warm burner... stupid electric stove).
5. He respects my wishes.
6. He isn't afraid to stand up to me, and he always flirts back.
7. He loves listening to me read to him... right now it's Cloud of Sparrows
8. Even when I feel like I am failing, he sees me as wonderful and beautiful (but not perfect as he likes to remind me.)
9. He is a total dork, and it's totally adorable, and often makes me laugh.
10. He washes the dishes every day, even on the days when I don't hold up my end of the bargain and cook.


I remember the day we got married oh so long ago... ok a month ago. I remember how I felt. I was scared, and worried, and nervous, maybe a little panicked. And then I remember seeing him waiting for me at the end of the aisle, and all of that went away, because I knew who I was marrying and I knew that this was the man that God had chosen for me. I admit that I cried my way down that aisle, clinging to my dad for support. And then after the ceremony and after the reception, when it was just the two of us, I forgot once again what we were together, and I became nervous. It wasn't until we got to our bed and breakfast after dinner and he was being a total dork, that I remembered that I didn't have to be nervous... And now, a month later, I remember that girl and I feel totally different from her. The nervousness, the fear, they have been replaced with security and comfort. A knowledge that God has a plan for our lives together, and that Ben desires that end as much as I, has caused me to write ridiculously long sappy run-ons.

So many people have asked me what married life is like. This is what I have decided to say... "Married life is like regular life, but with somebody." It's not my life anymore, it's our life, and like all lives it's messy and imperfect and exciting and sad and happy and funny and irritating and exhilarating and a million other words. And I get to share all of that with him. For better or for worse... whether he likes it or not.

The good news is... He does like it.

I didn't think it would happen to me.

I'm having wedding dreams. More and more of them as time goes on. I've been engaged for almost a year, and I haven't had any, so I thought I was going to get away with not having them. But I was wrong, terribly terribly wrong. At first, the dreams were distantly related to marriage kind of. Unfortunently, as the actually day grows closer and closer, they are more and more about the actual wedding. Take last nights for example. It was the day of the wedding, and nothing was ready. Tables hadn't been set up, the cake had not been decorated, there were no chairs for people to sit on. And we have a late morning ceremony, so I was freaking out, trying to figure out how to get all of that taken care of and get ready and have time to take pictures before the ceremony started. And on top of that, Beyonce was a guest at my wedding. I really don't want to have any more of those dreams thank you very much. I would much rather have everything in place by the day before so that I have absolutely nothing to worry about. I think I need to get a grip on my subconcious self.

Money: The Root of All Evil

Actually it's the love of money that is the root of all evil, but that's neither here nor there. As the bible says in Luke 16:13 "No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money." Now neither Ben nor I are devoted to money. But that does not mean that we can be financially irresponsible. We are stewards of the money God has given us. The problem is, I absolutely HATE talking about money, and Ben is HORRIBLE at keeping track of his money. So this basically leaves me in charge of what I hate talking about. So here I am sitting at my computer, looking over all these sheets which are designed to help me organize everything so that I am aware of my finances.

But the problem is, with us moving just after our wedding, and therefore NOT having jobs when we get there immediately, I have no idea what our income is going to be. And right now, only having me on insurance, I have no idea what our insurance will be when we are on it together. I know what our rent will be, but I don't know what other housing expenses we might have. So I don't know how much we will tithe and how much taxes will be taken out, and that makes it really hard to make up a budget.

Sooooooooo annoying. So I guess what I'm complaining about it more unknown. Which frankly, seems to be a theme in my life right now... complaining about the unknown. Complaining about not knowing about jobs... complaining about not knowing how I will handle winter somewhere darker and colder... complaining about not knowing how to plan meals for a whole week in a fiscally responsible (and nutritious) way. No wonder I have been feeling so pathetic lately. Poor me. Poor poor poor me.

Thanks to Lady Gaga, I've found the solution...

As you may or may not know, from previous posts, I am getting married this summer. And what you definitely did not know, is that our honeymoon is in Hawaii. Now the story behind my wedding dress is that I found it for $50 and it fit perfectly. It just needed some minor detail fixing and to be steam cleaned. Because the dress fits perfectly (and there isn't extra fabric to let out the seams) I cannot gain wait. And for the most part, I think I have stayed pretty consistent despite my over endulging in carbs and my laziness in the whole working out department. But Hawaii changes everything!!!! Sure my fiance would love me no matter how much weight I gain, and he certainly thinks I am attractive now, but that is not the point. The point is, I will be spending practically a whole week in nothing but my bikini. And my tummy looks a wee bit on the fluffy side as of late. (The rest of me is fine, I think. Just the abdominal region needs serious work.)
So I found this get in shape workout thingy on www.theknot.com which lines out a six month plan on how to get in shape before your wedding. The only problem is, it calls for like 40 minutes of cardio three times a week. It's too icky outside to go running outside right now. I don't own a treadmill and I have no desire to pay for a gym membership I won't probably use. I could go ice skating at the rink (but I don't own my own skates so that would be $30 a week to exercise which is more than I would be paying for my gym membership.) And you know, to be honest, I get bored out of my mind "working out". I need music, or a movie, or someone to talk to. I had a real cunundrum. How to get the cardio I need, do it at home, and have fun while I do it? Then in a flash of brilliance, brought on by Lady Gaga, Step Up 2, and many fond childhood memories, came my solution.

JUST DANCE!!!!

Now besides swing dancing, I have never had a professional dance lesson in my life. Most of what I know how to do I learned from watching other people, movies, TV shows, and music videos. A lot of it is also just moving my body. I am physically incapable of staying skill when music is being played. I should have pestered my parents for dance lessons more as a child. But despite a formal education and more often than not making a fool out of myself, I absolutely LOVE to dance. So I put together an upbeat hip-hop playlist on my iPod and have sworn to myself that three times a week I will dance to this playlist. I intentionally picked songs that require a lot of moving fast and exaggerated movements so that I will be able to keep my heart rate up. And in the spring and summer, I will probably add hiking and biking along with this. But right now I am very happy about the solution. I will be able to do my cardio in a fun and FREE way, so that I can look totally and completely kick butt on the beach in Hawaii
(if you overlook my dreadfully white skin of course.)

P.s. So You Think You Can Dance is my all time favorite competition reality TV show (followed closely by ANTM), so I thought I'd just give it a bit of a shout out here.

Recent Obsessions...

1. Brandon Sanderson - He's the author of Elantris and the Mistborn trilogy and I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE his books. (I just stared reading the second book in the Mistborn trilogy called "The Well of Ascension". And I've read Elantris and Mistborn already.)He takes a genre that I feel like I've reached the depths of whats available, and gives it facets that I didn't even know exsisted. First off, in both, he has created two completely different worlds with two completely original forms of magic. Both are like nothing I have ever seen!!! They are different from each other, and different from everything else out there. So if you like fantasy or sci fi books, you should definitely read his books. They are amazing!!!

2. Rewatching episode of Sailor Moon on www.youtube.com. I'm going to be honest. I have a very special soft spot in my heart for anime. I began watching it in Junior High, and have loved it ever since. I mostly like the goofy, lighthearted ones, more than the really serious ones... but here are some of my favorites. Ronin Warriors... Sailor Moon... (my all-time favorite) Ranma 1/2... Inuyasha... (and I'll admit it) Dragonball Z... Hiyao Myiazaki Films... and there are a few more that I really like. The other day, I was having a really crummy day and I needed to do something mind numbing and I realized that there was this really awesome lady on youtube who has uploaded all of the Sailor Moon Videos, so I began to watch them. I'm on Episode 14 of season one (english version) and I'm pretty sure I want to continue to watch them all. So yes, I've been a total sci fi/fantasy/anime geek for the past week or so. And you know what, I'm proud of it!!! So there!!!

SORE THROAT!!!

Holy Crap body!!! So like two weeks ago, I became horribly ill and sickly with the worlds most awful cold ever. It began with losing my voice, then continued to a horrible sore throat, a mild (and short lasting) fever, sinus pressure, a runny nose... I felt awful... but thankfully as a week past I began to feel better. I had energy. Sure, my nose was a little runny still and I had a horrible hacking cough, but I was feeling better and better. And now, a week after that, my nose barely runs and I don't think I've coughed in two days. YAY!!! I'm healing!!!

Or at least I thought I was... but I seem to have a nagging sore throat. First it got better, and I couldn't feel it. Then I coughed a whole bunch over almost a week and it was a little raw. So I thought that it would get better as my coughing decreased. But it hasn't... I'm starting to think that it's getting worse. It's getting harder to swollow... yawning is uncomfortable. Other than that I feel fine. I have energy. I can sing (no scratchy voice loosing thingy). There is no sinus pressure. I'm pretty sure I don't have a fever. But this sore throat is AWFUL!!! So I have come to a conclusion... if my sore throat continues to get worse, and I do not see improvements I'm going to suck it up and go see a doctor next week. Lets hope for the sake of my pocketbook (heehee that sounds so old fashioned) that it improves soon and quickly.... I want to feel normal again.

I may need an intervention...

It's 12:25 and I have to be up in less than five hours for work. Instead, here I am, updating my blog, which no one reads except my fiance and one of my best friends. I think I'm going to need a lot of caffeine tomorrow. Good thing the staff room has free unlimited sludge (it only thinks it's coffee) and that I bought a case of Throwback Mountain Dew (which will make for an excellent mid afternoon pick me up).